JAVS Fall 2005

MEEt THE SECTION THE VIOLISTS OF THE HOUSTON SYMPHONY

By Rita Porfiris

Author's note: T he Journal of the American Viola Society was w fea ture the violists of the Houston Symphony as part of its regular feature "Meet the Section . .. " However, upon arriva l at Jones llall on the appo inted interview day of September 19th,* the AVS representative suddenly and inex pli cably found herself set upon by a mob of unruly and bloodthirsty pirates. After much waving of what looked suspiciously li ke viola bows but were being referred to by the strange bunch as "cutlass es," our interviewer was promp tly bundled up and hauled onto the deck of a very odd ship. The fol lowing is a transcription of the only aud ible portion of the tape that was found , along with pieces of dried kelp, broken rosi n, half eaten chocolate doubloons, and a bi t of a dirty red sash, washed up on the distant shores of Myanmar (Burma). )AVS has since found out that September 19th is International Talk Like A Pirate Day AYS: The interview aboard Lh e Ship o' tl1 e Festerin' Callus. My resea rch show that most of you became viol. . .Tmean pirates, at the age of 11 or 12. Why were you drawn to this life?

L to R: Candy Casey Bloodletter ("For s11re, Dan Strba, T'd recognize that steely eyedglint anywhere... "}; Rabid Betsy Rackharn (''That disfiguring scar is vny sinister- Phyllis Herdliska?}; joy "Bane o' the Sea" Plesner (newly Ret.}; Dirty Mary Cutler (''Hard to telL through aiL the dirt- but 1 think it's Fay Shapiro!"}; Bloody Bess Kidd {"Ts that a woman? Looks Like johnny Depp in 'Pirates ofthe Caribbean"'}; Tmn Roger Hacke ("Nice hat-is that George PascaL?}; !ron Anne Fmnkenberry ("Linda GoLdstein? I thought she was aLLergic to parrots"}; Dread Pirate Vane ('/! dead ringer for· Joan DerHovesepian, except for the mustache and the artificial Leg"}; CaLico Torn Bonney ("That has GOT to be ihomas Molloy"). Cap'n Morgan Flint (sotto voce: "bears a stmnge and disturbing rf'semblanre to Wayne Brooks") and Pegleg ]nell Cotton ("Wei Jiang-! always t/;ought /;e had piratical tendenries") were out pillaging at the time ofthis photo.

Rabid Betsey: Pi llagin'. (cries of assenr in the background: "LooLin!!" "Pillagin! " "Th' grog!" "Aye!Arrr!" "Loorin!!!" "Ya rrgh!!")

diny little secret is rhat I used to be a violinisLafore Twas led into the piratey light. Iron Roger: Harrr! I was a lousy violinist! From th' time I picked up me Grsr cutlass, rhar's been no lookin' back. Dirty Ma1y: Violinist, pal1! (sp its) They tried ra get me ra play that lily-livered bilge-box, bur 'rwas the call o' the grog thaL was stronger!

AVS: Okay... but aside from tooL ing and pillaging...

(silence)AVS: Did any of you play any orher. ..INSTRUMENTS... before you became pirates?

Bloody Bess: (whispers) Llss, me

Pegleg Jack: lootin' and pi llagin'.

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